"You're right, I'm sorry. But you know very well that I'm messed up right now! Come on, let's talk about it calmly next time, they're waiting for me now."
Cleared as an ice cube in the oven.
"Sorry!" I tackle her.
"Before you leave, I wanted to ask you a few things about Roberto..."
"Who?" Questioning air. She sounds sincere.
"Roberto? Does Lilim ring a bell?"
Come on, don't pretend. Remember? The idiot from the ritual...
"I don't know who you're talking about, I think you've confused me with someone else. Sorry, but I really have to go."
She unwraps me like candy. I contain my pissed off and hold her arm with one hand.
"Listen to me, baby: I don't know what the hell you two have been up to, but know that Roberto is in the hospital reduced to a human larva, maybe even because of you! You're the last person who saw him in a decent condition and you know what he did to get like this! Do you have a shred of conscience?"
Buba's huge hand presses one of my shoulders.
"Hey, man! Don't you think you're overreacting?"
End of a friendship.
Hers is peaceful advice to let go. She lowers her gaze in mortification. I release my grip and calm down. Then with a sigh I turn to Buba.
"I don't hold it against her. But she's the only one who can give me answers and I know she has them!"
"What if she doesn't want to give them to you?" I could always pull her hair, like a good caveman would, until she spoke.
"No, Buba, wait. He's right, she's entitled to some answers." Oh! We finally made it!
"Anyway, I'm not the last one to see him before... before he got sick." Her voice trembles.
"Weren't you the pretty brunette from the chat room meeting?"
"No, I didn't go that night. Lilim... Roberto had told me about it and I was very worried."
"Worried about what?" If I had a nymphomaniac like that!
"I told him not to do it... but that stubborn man wouldn't listen to me!"
"Do? Do what?" I press curiously.
She almost makes to answer, when a woman's croaky voice interrupts her.
"Well? Angela, are you moving or are you going on strike tonight?"
"Yes, yes! I'll be right there, excuse me." I turn around. There's a woman in her early years who looks like an arm wrestler.
"She's the owner! I have to go or she'll fire me. Do you have a cell phone?"
"Yes..." I pull it out of my pocket and hand it to her.
She grabs it with her tapered hands and quickly types a number on the keypad. She presses enter and hangs up to memorize it.
"This is my number, call me tomorrow after 5pm! Bye."
With that said, she runs over to the open cage, locks it from the inside, and pushes a button that makes it slowly rise to the ceiling.
"Bye, Angela!" Buba, with his little hand, greets her as she climbs without deigning him a response.
I remain staring at that beautiful moving maiden as I think back to the enigmatic phrases she threw at me.
I'm watching Buba as he tries to peek at the number she has dialed on my cell phone, which I'm absent-mindedly holding with the display facing up. Realizing I'm looking at it, he turns around with an angelic look. I smile at the pathetic scene, but think that in her place, maybe I would have done the same.
"He must be something very important, to have left you his number. She's never given it to me in two years."
Maybe because she's more sane than she seems?
"Well, yes, it's a very touchy matter!"
But don't be jealous gorilla.
"Can I give you my number in case you want to go on a double date with one of her friends?"
This one is worse than a pit bull that won't let go.
"Of course, but be warned: I'm not trying to hook up with her, I just need her help."
Is he going to get in your fat head?
"Yeah, yeah, sure! I was just saying that, just saying..."
Okay, let's exchange this number so you can go to bed tonight happily ever after.
Finally home, another ten minutes in that club with Buba and I would have had to do a liver transplant. How do some guys always drink like that? I'm so woozy from the beers that I can't even take stock of the situat....
I jolt awake. I quickly and abruptly turn my head left and right. Shocked, I look for something that isn't there. I realize that sweat has totally soaked my hair and is now running down my face.
I wipe my face with my hands to get rid of that annoying itchy feeling.
It's not just this that irritates me, but the dream. That damn dream that for a quarter is still stuck in my mind. To put it better, it's the unpleasant feeling of anguish that has left me, also because I don't really remember a damn thing.
I get up and gently rub the knuckles of my aching hand. I look at them: they're red as if I'd punched something... or someone!
Flash.
I find myself in an alley in an unfamiliar neighbourhood. Behind me there are two buildings closing at an angle as if they were that of a ring.
Flash.
It's the middle of the night and in the distance I hear the roar of what could be a river.
Flash.
Something is changing, I don't think I'm alone anymore.
Flash.
Certainty. There's a shadow peering at me: it's menacing!
It looks like a crawling figure. It quickly approaches and assaults me. Instinct makes me raise my arm as a shield. It doesn't look human. It is hairy and smells terrible. With one hand I squeeze its hairy neck as I see, from its gaping jaws, sharp canines pointing at my throat. A full moon slowly makes its way through the clouds and illuminates the creature: it's a big black wolf. An atavistic terror envelops me and with my fist I desperately try to strike the animal's muzzle. With every moment my resistance weakens and the deadly fangs get closer.
Then, suddenly a mighty whistle breaks through. The beast is distracted and I take the opportunity to push it away with a shove, using my last strength. It works.
With a leap I get back up and wobbly I try not to fall back to the ground. I stiffen my muscles, ready for a new attack. But the wolf doesn't move and turns his head backwards, intent on staring at a motionless figure that fades into the horizon. It is a woman with long hair, moved by an imperious wind that envelops her. She raises an arm and makes a gesture of call. The wolf obeys immediately. I look at that distant woman and I don't know how, although I can't see her face, I perceive that she is smiling at me, while the animal, at the end of the run, crouches at her feet with docile reverence. With an elegant and decisive step he comes towards me. The wolf stands up and follows her like a silent guardian. Petrified, I watch the scene. My heart begins to beat rapidly: Tum! Tum! Tum! Now I hear the beats echoing like drums in the air: Tum! Tum! Tum! Tum! They increase with each step of the woman: Tum!Tum! Tum! Tum! Tum! Tum! She's pretty close, but I can't see her features yet: Tum! Tum! Tum! Tum! Tum! Tum! Tum! Tum! Everything becomes blurry, my legs become soft as wax in the fire and I collapse on my knees. I try, squinting my eyes, to make the scene clearer, but the oppressive darkness catches me: Tum... Tum... Tum... and my heart gradually slows down before exploding.
Flash!
As if coming out of a long apnea, I let out a loud sigh. I smile as I recognize the room where I've spent so many nights.
Would you look at that dream! Damn alcohol!
Chapter 4
Angela
I keep moving up and down the room, thinking of a thousand and one possible scenarios of what could have happened: the absurd ones far outnumber the normal ones.
I look at the clock for the umpteenth time: 17:15. I really think I could call her now.
The phone rings: once, twice, three times... come on, damn it, what are you waiting for to answer!
Fifth ring: "Hi, I'm not home at the moment, if you want you can leave a message..."
And no, damn, another damn answering machine! Come on, let's talk like a moron with this thing.
"...beep!"
"Hi Angela, it's Davide. We met last night at the club...sorry, but you said to call you after five. When you come back you can call me anytime at 06..."
What the hell! I hung up the phone unnerved, both by Angela's absence and by the feeling of complete idiocy that envelops me every time I talk to an answering machine; and I was hoping they had become extinct like dinosaurs!
By way of ballast I throw myself heavily into the chair. Hypnotized, I follow the hand of the pendulum, which inexorably marks the minutes. It's not one of the best pastimes, but it works.
6:20 p.m.
Driin! Driin!
I make a quick dash toward the device. The edge of the table finds me unprepared and I hit it with my shin. Pain in the ass.
"Hello?"
"Hi Davide, it's Angela. I just got in the house, my daughter Elisa has been wasting my time around, sorry to keep you waiting."
"No worries, I've had a few things to do myself anyway..." Like stare at the pendulum for about an hour.
"I've been thinking all day about the fact that my behaviour toward Roberto has not been very fair. Partly I feel guilty for what happened to him, but mostly because, out of fear, I abandoned him when he needed it."
"I'm sorry, Angela, but I'm a little confused, what really happened to him? I would need you to tell me everything from the beginning. Would you be willing?" I try to be calm, but in fact mine is not really a question.
"Yes, you're right, it's better to start everything from the beginning, but I'd rather talk to you about it in person. I don't live very far from the Canvas, would you like to meet me at home?"
"Sure, that can be arranged."
As he gives me directions, I can't help but smile at the thought of Buba and the blow he'd get if he only learned about the appointment.
It takes me ten minutes to get to my destination and twenty to find a decent parking spot that is discreetly out of the obsessive reach of some easy-pencilled vigilante and/or auxiliary with the sensitivity of a hungry crocodile. Maybe I exaggerated, hungry crocodiles are much more sensitive.
I ring the doorbell and a cheeky little voice asks me who I am. This should be the daughter.
"I'm Davide, a friend of mom's. Is she home?"
She'd be missed.
"Wait a moment, I'll go ask her if she's in."
Perfect secretary sorting visits.
A sound of deadbolts makes me assume that Mom has answered that she is home.
The door opens and the figure of a maybe three-foot gnome appears, her arms clasped at her sides.
"You're lucky, Mom said she's there and you can come in. She's in the bathroom right now, go ahead and have a seat."
She points to the doorway with her hand as she catches her breath from the long sentence she just displayed.
I thank her and smiling I enter the house. I notice that she looks at me grimly. All of her mother.
