Сергей и Дина Волсини "To Forgive or To Revenge. Collection of articles"

To Forgive or To Revenge. Collection of articles
Сергей и Дина Волсини

Сборник статьей
Being deprived of love, you can be bearing resentment against the offender a lifetime, but you can also forgive and find happiness again. At the moment when the person is emotionally wounded, he faces a choice – to forgive or to revenge. Whichever way may he choose to avenge, he ultimately destroys himself and deprives himself of love for life. And only the one, who forgives, can start a new life: he can revive himself with the power of his love and open a new chapter of his life, which has everything to make him happy.

Having appeared in glossy magazines in 2010-2013, the articles, written by Volsini couple, have created a great furor among the readers. With honesty, characteristic to the authors, they explain why good people face bad problems, what similar is between a prostitute and a respectable lady, what threats are for a man when marrying "the father's daughter", how fans destroy personal lives of celebrities and what is still unknown to traditional psychology. The book includes the most interesting publications and new articles, which are published for the first time.

The publishing layout of the book has been saved in PDF A4 format.

To Forgive or To Revenge

Copyright В© 2014 by Sergey and Dina Volsini

В© Illustrated by Roman Shisterov, 2014

В© Translated from Russian to English by Yuriy Chetverzhuk, 2014

To Forgive or to Revenge

Love is the main thing a man lives for, and everyone is aware of it in his heart. There's no man who would not seek for love, who would not aspire to give it and receive it in return. However, there are situations when we start to think that we are not fated to meet our destiny and to perceive happiness of mutual love. No matter how hard we try, all for nothing, as if we are destined for being alone. Can one person influence the fate of another by depriving of love just through his intention? So let's try to make it clear.

How Does a Problem Emerge?

Let's imagine that a man meets his love, his true soul mate, with whom he is convinced he is destined to pass the track of life. But something happens that does not make these plans come true. Someone's intervention does not allow to stay with the beloved, severs a man from the love of his life and puts the end to his love. A huge outcry is born in the human soul at the moment, the reasons of which can be easily explicable: his soul might have been embodied in this world just for the sake of being with the beloved, and it is the main task of his life. But now when his love is taken away he feels as if he is deprived of life.

Who would be this protest directed at? To the one what a man finds to be responsible for his woes. If this is a society with its foundations, then a man would rebel against the society, its laws and authorities. If these are any circumstances, the fate or even the God himself, a man would be disillusioned with religion, higher powers or his faith. But if he considers a particular person to be responsible for having taken away his love, the entire protest would be directed at the person. He would be addressed with the darkest wishes, for a man wishes to punish the offender, to take revenge, to make him feel what a man has experienced before.

Whenever we want somebody to lose a loved one or to lose something that is dear to his heart, thus we wish him to stay without love, and, therefore, not to stay alive. Concentrated wish for “dis-love” directed at a specific person, is, in fact, wish for death.

To this day, there are some societies in which such wishes are to be implemented in the most primitive way – depriving the offender of his life, such as a blood feud of mountain people or vendetta of Sicilians. However, in most cases, that is not an issue of physical violence. At the same time wishing death is not going away, and black arrows of grievances are targeting the offender with the same force as well. So, what would happen next? There are three versions of events.

Version One

A man might express his protest in no way, if the one who deprived him of love, were an unshakable authority in his eyes. This might be one of the older members of the family, for example, a mother whose opinion is not questioned, or a father, whose word is law. The higher authority of the parent is, the less is the likelihood that the misfortune of a man might be known by anyone in general, because he dares not even hint that his heart is broken through the fault of the parent. He does not allow himself to doubt the parent and tries to convince himself that the parent is right, but the heart is protesting, because it feels the opposite. Hence a conflict arises, and, because a man does not allow himself to put it outside – to acknowledge, much less – to voice, – the energy of the protest finds no output, and, staying inside a man, begins to destroy him.

Spiritual dissonance leads to the destruction of the body, and a young, healthy person, as soon as started out in life, suddenly feels ill. What kind of and how severe the disease is – it depends on many factors, but one should not underestimate the challenge: a man, confused and having lost his faith in love, is ready to leave this world with ease, and if there's no help in time, then it happens – through illness or other tragic event. People who have passed away at a young age, single elderly women who have never married and have no children, men who couldn't find their feet and refused to start a family – all these are examples of suppressed and deeply hidden conflicts based on the idea imposed upon a person of the impossibility of love.

Version Two

In another case, a man finds a specific person to be responsible for his unhappiness. That might be a woman who has severed from the beloved, a man who is a rival, or, for example, someone who has slandered a person in the eyes of beloved and has become a cause of the break. At the same time the one, who is deprived of love, can be wrong in his findings and cannot see the whole picture of what is happening, but it is impossible to convince the person: as he believes the responsible is found.

He cannot punish the offender himself, but remains in full confidence that the offender should and will be punished, because justice should prevail. Person may express his opinion straight to the offender or may tell him nothing, but speak out at his back imposing his point of view upon others, spreading rumors and setting others against the offender. It does also happen that a person hypocritically communicates with the offender, is well received at his home and family, maintains outwardly good relations pretending the former resentment is gone.

Whatever the mask a man could wear he hides the resentment and matures most bad wishes in his heart. Every time, remembering the offender, he mentally creates negative images around him and increases them scrolling in his mind over and over again. Person generates the offender's punishment and lives in expectation of the divine scourge day by day. But he ignores a single point – all these feelings are by his own, and therefore they start to be playable in his own life.

Whether these wishes can affect whom they are addressed or not, but the man, staying in the grievance and anger, brings relevant events primarily to himself and his loved ones. And when there is another bad luck, he justifies himself with that old story again and habitually blames someone who once treated him unfairly.

Here is an example of life. The young man was injured after falling from a ladder. He considered his brother to be responsible for that, because the latter was close to him at the time, but couldn't help. At the same time he was going through parting with the girl whom he was going to marry, and thus he began to blame his brother not only in the loss of health, but in all the subsequent misfortunes as well, the main of which – the loss of love. For the next twenty years a woman was constantly staying with him. She became both his housekeeper and the companion in his business. She loved him selflessly and was devoted to him, but the resentment did not allow the man to see this love – he was living with the memories of the past and waiting for the day when justice would prevail and the fate would punish his brother.

It often happens a person is taken pity on and sympathized with because of that past story, and given help as well, but all in vain: he seems to be looking for new troubles on purpose, as if trying to prove that no good can happen no longer in his life – and that's all for the same reason. There is more trouble, hurt is all the stronger. Resentment grows and the number of misfortunes increases. Thus a vicious circle is formed, and only the man himself can leave it if he dares to do so. But if he undertakes nothing, negative feelings and corresponding events will spread to his children and grandchildren, thereupon they will have to improve the situation.

How to Deal With the Problem

What will happen to those whom negative feelings are directed at? Since this is a deliberate attempt to damage the soul and life of another person, then one should hold truly enormous power to resist it. And it is absolutely impossible to do so, if the person, whom the negative feelings are addressed to, feels guilty or afraid. If the person even for a moment admits the idea that he really deserves to be punished, he immediately opens the door towards a mighty stream of negative wishes directed at him.

What can we say about when he basically agrees with the accusations against him, reproaches himself and lives with his willingness to make amends – in this case, the door remains permanently open, and negative energy is supplied to his subtle bodies with a continuous flow, which is implemented by a succession of life problems, so one should only manage to cope with them.

Fear results in the same outcome, though its impact is a bit different. For example, a person is sure that he shouldn't blame himself for nothing. However, he suspects or knows for sure about the negative wishes that are strewed at him, and fears that they will come true. Fear always attracts what we fear. And when a nuisance does occur, the person explains this by the intentions of others, but not by his own mistakes, and thus, he not only sees no real reason, but he also empowers someone's negative wishes, that is he personally supports the impact of other people's energy on his life.

What about if there is a fault for sure? If you think that you have really made a mistake, have done wrong and now do repent of your deeds? Then you should do the following: visualize the image of a man whom you feel guilty to, and sincerely ask him for forgiveness, and then forgive yourself. To forgive yourself is no less important than to ask for forgiveness, because that is what allows you to get rid of worries and remove the burden from your heart. All this can be done in a temple, as well as you can do it staying at home, the place does not matter. It is important that your heart is easy. Do it just once. There is no need to go back to this story no longer – neither in thoughts nor in conversations, otherwise the mechanism of punishment wouldn't disappear.

How This Works

On the subtle plane, a man who bears someone's negative wishes has a foreign connection on the occipital side of the head. Since somebody who craves punishment has a clear image of the responsible person, so he makes a kind of connection to the latter and transmits the “messages” by established channels. Negative thought forms are transmitted by them like through a pipe. Those forms have a direct impact both on the way the person thinks, on what he thinks about, and on what decisions he makes.

Alien energy saddles a man, clogs up his head, redirects his thoughts, brings heaviness and turbidity, creates a sense of apathy and powerlessness, and makes him to see the life in shades of gray. Ignorant person accepts these sensations for his own and builds his life on the basis of them. It begins to seem to him as if everything goes bad, things are not moving, plans come apart at the seams, the years roll by, and there is no happiness ever. His heart becomes heavy and his hands are dropped because of these thoughts. Such a state is the first sign that there is a connection on the thin body by which strange and harmful energy comes.

If we generalize, the meaning of any negative wish is always the same – to deprive a person of love. That's why it falls on women as impossibility to meet a soul mate, to stay with a loved one or inability to give birth to his child. The same applies to women living in marriage, but feeling lonely, deprived of happiness and love. The man affected by such energy, feels as if there is no possibility for him to find his feet, to meet a soul mate, to start a family, to provide it in a proper manner, to feel like a man in every sense of the word.

If you are experiencing similar feelings, there's no need to be afraid. Effect of foreign energy can be identified and removed using special techniques which allow to eliminate connections on a subtle level and replace feelings.

To Be One's Own Master

Lately, advising people, we often face the situation when a person entangled in the problems and quite desperate finds such an explanation of this – I was told that I was cursed, that's all my troubles come from. Speaking of this, the person usually imagines such a witch conjuring with her potions and sending all sorts of misfortune to people.

Thus the person has the right feeling: there is a real flow of alien energy. However, the source of the problem is not a witch-woman, as it is commonly believed; it is much closer – the man himself, or rather, an unresolved issue with some of his relatives. This can be a mother who hasn't approved her daughter's choice; a father who hasn't forgiven his son for something; a brother or a sister nursing a grievance in his/her heart. The feeling of guilt and fear of punishment makes a person go out of his way: he tries to resolve the conflict, explain or justify himself, make amends.

Imperceptibly for the man himself, this goal becomes the basis of his life; it governs all his thoughts, all his time and all of his resources. He tries to achieve just one thing – to earn forgiveness, for only this might remove the burden off his heart and give a long-awaited freedom. But every time the man fails, and would ever fail, if he didn't stop waiting for forgiveness from someone.

One should forgive himself first, as well as allow himself to live a new life without backing up the former scenario of relationships.

Here are some examples from our practice. Man faced a crisis in all the areas of his life: the business collapsed, his wife left with the children, and health problems started as well. The core of this situation was a huge sense of guilt towards his younger brother who had been imprisoned for many years. The man blamed himself all these years: it became his lifework to help his brother and his family. It required more money; the man did not dare to refuse and ultimately lost everything.

In the other case, a young woman could not set her personal life going: a man, with whom she had been dating for a few years, did not want to undertake the next step. They did not live together and did not plan to have children. She felt she was in a deadlock. The reason for that was the unconscious intention of the woman to arrange the life of her elder sister at the cost of her own happiness. Beginning of this model was based on an old case when her elder sister's wedding collapsed. Younger sister considered herself to be responsible for that and then did her best to make amends before the elder. Guilt made a woman to be engaged in her sister's life for years and to do everything possible for the latter was happy. She thought that the worse her own life was as compared to the sister's life, the better it was; because it was the only way she could feel she made amends and earned forgiveness. Once we explained the situation and helped her get rid of the guilt, she felt enormous relief. Shortly thereafter, her life turned around: the long-playing story of unpromising relations ended, and she met a man who loved her and was going to start a normal family life with her.

No one can take a love from a man, lead him astray, and manage his life at all, unless he does not allow doing that with him. There is no man – neither near nor stranger – able to cause such damage to another man, unless the latter has given its consent himself, consciously or unconsciously.

Version Three

Dramatic effects can be avoided if the person, who has been treated unfairly with by depriving of his love, will be able to understand the situation. To understand – means to comprehend what has happened and to change the feelings in his heart.

So, the first thing to do is to understand the reasons for the events and to acknowledge your part in them. Second thing is to get rid of resentment, hatred and revenge, in other words, not to form negative wishes to address anyone at all. In case the protest against injustice was not manifested in a due time, one should express his feelings in any way acceptable for himself: for example, write a letter, or meet and speak out quietly, talk about past feelings, or do all that mentally, in meditation. And then one should forgive the responsible men. Forgiveness of offenders and self-forgiveness is the exact lead, because at this point there is a transformation of negative energy into the energy of love, and the problem leaves a person's life completely.

And, finally, from this moment one should start living with the feeling that the past is left behind. Life makes you wait no longer. Once love has taken its place in the human soul, it is immediately manifested in his life as well.

Being deprived of love, you can be bearing resentment against the offender a lifetime, but you can also forgive and find happiness again. At the moment when the person is emotionally wounded, he faces a choice – to forgive or to revenge. Whichever way may he choose to avenge, he ultimately destroys himself and deprives himself of love for life.

And only the one, who forgives, can start a new life: he can revive himself with the power of his love and open a new chapter of his life, which has everything to make him happy.

Being Talented in All Things

Any contemporary, thoughtful and intelligent individual has not been tempted any more by an idea to make money solely for the sake of sprawling on the beach till his dying day, having no concern of anything and doing anything anymore. The happiness criteria have changed themselves. The most frequently, attempting to give a definition of happiness, the people describe this condition by such expressions as “this is when you succeed”, “when you intend something, and it is accomplished”, “this is such a feeling as if you were tracked from somewhere from on high”. To the foreground there emerges a human need to realize oneself, and not only at work, but in one's life in general. More evident there appears the circumstance that a high achiever of our time is an individual being enthusiastic by his life.

Great Difference

Let us imagine two individuals, being employed in the same sphere, occupying the same position and in the same conditions. However, one of them is fond of his business, and for the other one it is just a job.

The first one wakes up in the morning with joy: In front of him there is the livelong day to be full with blessed events. In the morning he wakes up with ease and he is going to work with joy – he is excited to go ahead with his affairs. The second one wakes up not readily. He is reluctant to get up, however he has to. Onwards, just endless boondoggle is awaiting him, which he is forced to be concerned with on a day-to-day basis.

The first one comes to work in the smooth mood. He is facile in everything he does, and he succeeds in all things. He copes with dozens of affairs simultaneously and performs them easily as if without trying hard. He is pleased with a result himself and he inspires wonder among the others – nobody could have got it done in a better way! The second one makes himself to get down to business. Everything that could be left for the end will be laid aside by him, and he neglects everything that cannot be done right away. He is engaged in his job mechanically, without any spirit. Nothing brings him any joy – neither the process itself nor its result. Just to have it done somehow, and thank goodness. The time keeps jogging on, and it seems as if his working day will not have any end.

The first one winds up his working day with a feeling of pleasant satisfaction. The working day appeared to be a successful one. Probably, it was not easy at all, but he has succeeded! In his head there flock new ideas about, and he is full of plans for the following day. The second one experiences exhaustion and devastation at the end of the day. Just thinking that tomorrow expects him exactly the same day brings him into despair.

Out of this example we can observe that an individual being fond of his business lives a different life in broad-brush terms rather than that one just “going” to work. A feeling of embodiment enlarges not only upon the working activity of an individual, but also upon his life in general.

Quick temper, encouragement, enthusiasm, love of life – these qualities become somewhat symptomatic of individuals' traits and approve themselves in all real-life situations. Such an individual develops himself and gives momentum to the development of people surrounding him.

Performance with Satisfaction