You. Step-by-step guide toВ self understanding, managing and developing
Slava Makovich
We are not given a user manual at birth, but now we can find it on Amazon.YOU is a short actionable guide to make your life richer and more efficient.You will get:– helpful life principles;– practical strategies of managing your priorities, thoughts, decisions, and emotions;– proven advices on health, personal efficiency, career, communications, self-education, and other topics;– frameworks for behavior on concrete life situations.It’s time to become a more conscious user of yourself!
You
Step-by-step guide toВ self understanding, managing and developing
Slava Makovich
Proofreader Kristina Isaeva
Cover Designer Ilya Tikhomirov
© Slava Makovich, 2022
ISBNВ 978-5-0059-1037-0
Created with Ridero smart publishing system
INTRODUCTION
This book is the thing that IВ want toВ leave behind.
Below I’m going to share my helpful life principles, useful tools for self-management and specific instructions for specific situations. Everything that I would be glad to have myself when I was at the beginning of my journey, and everything that I want to convey to my children.
As short as possible, consistently practical and sometimes quite debatable.
Use, make notes, add your ideas. I hope that this book will bring you closer to noticing a piece of happiness in every day, to finding a teacher in every significant event, in creating meaning in every purposeful action and in revealing a new world in every person…
Wish you aВ pleasant and productive reading.
PART 1. PRINCIPLES
You are the creator ofВ yourВ past
Right now, you have aВ huge number ofВ options for your future. Do they depend on your past? OfВ course! But they are not determined byВ it.
The most important thing is toВ understand exactly what kind ofВ past you need toВ have inВ your future toВ have the kind ofВ success you want. And then systematically create such aВ past.
InВ essence, what we are doing at any given moment is creating aВ pattern ofВ our past consisting ofВ experiences, memories, and physical changes.
Those segments of the past that improve us and reveal our inherent potential go to the asset, those that are not – fly away without a trace…
Keep track ofВ what remains inВ the bottom line from each ofВ the activities, especially those that seem extremely important at first glance.
You are not your point ofВ view
AВ botanist, aВ hunter, aВ painter and aВ lumberjack see the forest inВ completely different ways.
The same situation through the eyes of different people is almost always different. Sometimes drastically. And at the same time, everyone can be right in their own way and not guess that their “truth” is not the only one.
Always try toВ look at aВ situation from different perspectives and never completely trust one point ofВ view, even if it is yours.
Trust people, but don’t take anything as absolute, unshakable truth.
Everyone, even great minds, constantly has made, do make, and will make mistakes, which sometimes even seem as significant wisdoms. You as well can sometimes be wrong. That’s okay. Don’t conflate yourself with your point of view.
And don’t be afraid to move it with facts. But try to separate opinions from facts. Including opinions about facts from facts.
“Today is good weather” is an opinion (for different people, good weather can be different), “today, in my opinion, 60°” is an opinion about a fact, “today it’s 59°F” is a fact, “today it’s 59°F on the thermometer and it’s raining” – a more complete set of facts.
Gain experience toВ understand what set ofВ facts you need for aВ satisfactory accurate understanding ofВ the situation. Think about what your opinion is based on, and communicate more often with smart people, including those who do not share your views.
You are always at “0” point
Any event is neutral. We can’t judge any event exactly whether it’s good or bad. Because, firstly, we do not know what the desirable alternative event would have led to (for example, an athlete who lost in the semi-finals could be seriously injured in the final), and, secondly, we do not know what the current event will eventually lead to (for example, being fired can serve as an impetus for starting your successful business).
Certainly it is necessary to have certain preferences in advance, because having inspiring goals is good for productivity and happiness levels, but you don’t need to judge events after they have already happened. Kill your internal examiner of life. Dream, act, plan, predict, feel, but don’t be against what happens to you, as well as what happens in the world around you.
Practice the ability toВ separate your assessment ofВ events and emotions. Remove the first, notice and use the second.
Practice the skill ofВ separating your desires and expectations that they are bound toВ come true. Take away the second, heed and intelligently implement the first.
That’s it! Forget the past and the unfulfilled alternatives. That’s the current situation, that’s what you have to work with, that’s the current “0” (Zero) point.
Could it be better? It could be better, but it isn’t! This is your current “0” point. So, put the past experiences into your knowledge baggage and move toward your “1”.
Could it be worse? Naturally!!! Be thankful that it didn’t, and go back.
You are always inВ the current situation, even if your thoughts are inВ the past or have already fled forward. Come them back.
Stop the struggles ofВ the past, draw conclusions and turn the page, moving on with your unique pattern ofВ memories, skills and connections.
You receive aВ gift everyВ day
Every day is aВ gift.
Every morning you get aВ new vessel that you can fill with something good, memorable and useful or faded and sad. It depends on your decisions and perception filter settings, because there are always reasons both toВ whine and rejoice.
To make it easier for you to make a positive cocktail, don’t lose your sense of gratitude to life for the shipment of vessels. It does, after all, in spite of the gigantic number of possibilities for stopping the supply, from a big solar flare to a small but very tenacious virus.
Every new day is aВ time toВ receive aВ gift that is far more valuable than any political slogans, religious beliefs, love frustrations or domestic problems. Every new day is an opportunity toВ use it inВ such aВ way toВ be able toВ remember it with joy or pride and toВ realize the opportunity toВ thank the world for having you inВ it. Each new day is the potential pleasure ofВ being.
You are working for yourself
We may have formal bosses and teachers, but everyone is ultimately accountable to themselves for the only thing we really have (I mean, Life). And as we know, accountability, unlike tasks, can’t be delegated.
When working for yourself, there are four important roles inВ relation toВ yourself that need toВ be discerned, accepted, executed inВ aВ proper time, and improved. You are simultaneously the owner, manager, doer and observer ofВ your life.
– High-quality performance of the role of a Doer allows you to efficiently (including not being distracted) perform the tasks intended by the Manager.
– High-quality performance of the role of a Manager allows you to take your head out off current affairs, consciously make the necessary adjustments and plan for future victory. You can manage, among other things, your states, actions, thoughts, thereby influencing the probabilities of future events.
– High-quality performance of the role of an Owner allows you to be not just efficient, but efficient in achieving really actual goals by understanding what you really want, setting priorities and limitations.
– High-quality performance of the role of an Observer allows you to “reboot”, change your perception and get a more adequate picture of the world. It is possible to fulfill this role, for example, through meditation, contemplation of beautiful natural phenomena, absorption of books, music, movies, performances…
Are you aВ good Owner, Manager, Doer and Observer? Are they inВ aВ good project?
Pay attention to each of the roles. Reserve time each day to be a Manager (at least to analyze the Doer’s work and plan the next day) and an Observer. At least “turn on” an Owner on a monthly basis.
The quality of performance of which of the roles is currently limiting your development? If the problem is as a Doer, then educate, change the motivation system or get the external supervision. If as a Leader – train, find a temporary external leader, or change projects. If as an Owner, then at least take more responsibility. If as an Observer – force yourself to make conscious pauses, to feel yourself in the current moment, and to observe without judging.
You are the main tool ofВ your achievements
